Some teach that a counselor must first develop a good relationship with his counselee in order to successfully minister to them. Fine, if it happens, but is it necessary to work at it? To counsel effectively? No.
Those who propagate the idea rarely, if ever, give Scriptural evidence for the view. And, just as seldom do they fail to explain what they mean by the term. After all, don’t we all know? NO!
Let’s consider Jesus’ relationships for a moment. He often had a compassionate relationship to them—healing, feeding and teaching them, as poor sheep who had no shepherd. Then, there were the Pharisees and the Sadducees—to whom He spoke words of woe!
Toward the twelve He sustained a special relationship—spending quite a bit of time with them. Of the twelve, there were the three whom He allowed to accompany Him to the Mount of Transfiguration. And, of course, there was John—the one He especially loved! What different relationships all of these, and many others, were! Surely, with his counselees, a counselor’s relationship would vary greatly.
But that’s not bad—because it is impossible to treat everyone as his John the apostle!
Nor does he need to. With most, Jesus had a brief encounter—nothing prolonged. Yet, He was able to help them. Counselor, so can you.